Jean-Paul Sartre said that “commitment is an act, not a word” and that sums it up pretty well but what does that mean for you and your partner?
Look at some of the points below and think about how they play out in your own relationship:
- Loyalty to your partner is a big sign of commitment – remembering not to be critical about them to other people, even if you’ve had a row that morning before you left for work.
- It almost goes without saying that trust is almost essential in a committed relationship – I say “almost essential” because sometimes people make stupid mistakes that they regret almost instantly but there are ways to work through that so that trust is restored eventually and both partners may value each other more afterwards.
- Part of commitment is about the love and respect that you have for each other – ignoring what your partner’s dreams are and trying to impose your own views and dreams onto them is not showing them respect, nor is compromising on your own standards.
- Sometimes, life throws hard times at you and if you can still support one another, sense the love even if your partner doesn’t tell you for a while and care for each other even when it seems almost impossible, then your relationship is a committed one.
- It’s easy to fall in love and say “I love you” but what about consistency? When the initial gloss has worn off, are you still able to go out of your way for your partner and put them first even if you’re finding them hard-going? If so, the consistency of your love shows that you’re really committed to your partner.
- A big point is having positive, shared experiences with your partner – if you’ve had those and are still having them, it can really build commitment between the two of you. Likewise, both managing to turn negatives into positives can be a great shared experience which turns into commitment.
- If you and your partner are making plans together, taking into account what the other person wants to do and where they see themselves in ten years time, there’s a good chance that you’re both committed to the relationship. Enjoy what you have and make the most of it.